I was supposed to wrote a blog post but I took a nap instead.
It was delicious. It was glorious. It was exactly what I needed . . . but it didn’t come easily.
I’ve just returned from a brilliant trip that involved taking a vacay and leading a yoga retreat in Costa Rica. I had a great time and felt so nourished and relaxed and fulfilled during the trip. But now I’m back and I am tired (like, “do I have a tropical disease or am I just really tired?” tired). And my supportive inner cheerleader is saying “Your trip was great! You’re completely refreshed! You shouldn’t be feel this way! You’ve got this!”)
But let’s be real: the act of travel is f*cking exhausting (I may have tried to squeeze in too much on the journey home with 3 cities, 4 flights, and a day-long yoga teacher training course. Lesson learned).
So I hopped off the plane and into the yoga studio to teach a room full of students I was delighted to see, followed by unpacking, and laundry, and bills, and emails, and real life. A few days later and I’m still feeling worn out. I was chatting with a couple of my fellow Nova Yoga teachers about it, saying how I just wanted to LIE DOWN between classes. It kinda went like this:
“Have a nap.”
“I can’t . . . I have a blog post to write.”
“The post can wait – if you’re tired, rest.”
“Ok.”
And off to Napland I went. But why couldn’t I get there on my own? Why did I have to wait for someone else to grant me permission to take care of myself?
I’m really good at treating myself in certain ways: eat that cake, buy those boots, take that trip. Done, done, and done. Take me out of my home base and I’m ready to chill, hard. But when I’m home and faced with the responsibility of owning and running a business I really struggle with resting and taking time off without feeling guilty about it. I know I take on a lot: it’s my workaholic nature but I also love what I do and have so many ideas I want to act on and projects I want to start (cue inner cheerleader: YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING!)
So here’s my work: I know that I’m really good at getting shit done and I wouldn’t trade that for anything – my determination and work ethic has served me well and has allowed me to create a rockin’ business and life that I love. But I DO need to get better at giving myself permission to chill, do nothing for an hour, or take an afternoon to rest if I need (even though the to-do list might be 108 pages long) SANS GUILT. We all know that self-care makes us better humans, right? Everyone benefits when we take time to take care.
So here’s to giving ourselves permission to be human: eat the cake, book the massage, take the nap, and don’t think twice about it.
-melanie-
xo